On Today’s Show –
| Introduction | 0:00.000 |
| Sorry For The Delay! | 2:20.058 |
| Dating Advice From An Idiot | 6:45.245 |
| Warning: Bloody Nastiness Ahead | 14:30.013 |
| Cutting Out Cheek Fat To Fit In Your Helmet | 15:17.383 |
| Jessie Lee Peterson Plugs White History Month | 19:38.922 |
| Support The Show! Sign Up For The Sideshow! | 26:13.744 |
| A Secret Forest Of Naked Women | 27:18.316 |
| Spiked Ice Cream! Gets Sloshed On Soft Serve! | 31:53.863 |
| Shark Attack In The Sky | 35:57.164 |
| Voicemail: 206-666-4463 / Ending | 40:34.976 |
