On Today’s Show:
| Introduction | 0:00.000 |
| A Meade Skelton House Tour | 2:02.637 |
| American Political Refugee In Mexico Is An Asshole | 8:37.958 |
| School Board Meeting Deals With Anal Cornholing In Literature | 15:18.748 |
| Ball Bag / Ball Busting | 20:11.332 |
| Sign Up For The Sideshow | 23:24.326 |
| Eating A Handburger | 24:11.622 |
| Satan Is Selling Chic-Fil-A On Sundays | 27:01.192 |
| What Goes Beeping In The Woods? | 30:46.230 |
| Measuring The Internal Size Of Your Penis | 33:17.428 |
| Voicemails: 206-666-4463 / Ending | 37:45.087 |
