On Today’s Show:
| Introduction | 0:00.000 |
| Disgusting Songs From Twisted Anus And More Homo Core Music | 1:55.656 |
| Weird Moment During The Apple iPhone Unveiling | 7:01.867 |
| The (Dead) Queen Of England Came On DV | 13:20.618 |
| Queen Of England Conspiracy – She Died Having Sex With A Horse | 15:07.022 |
| Queen Of England Conspiracy – She Was a School Shooter | 20:49.078 |
| Shoplifting or Vaginal Itch? YOU DECIDE | 23:55.759 |
| Become A True And Honorable Freak! | 27:48.065 |
| Alien Wannabe’s Newest Extreme Body Modification | 28:56.056 |
| Police Pervy Pants Got Into A Minor’s Mobile Phone And Almost Her Pants | 34:21.321 |
| Annoyed Bus Driver Threatens To Shoot Children | 40:47.771 |
| Voicemails: 206-666-4463 / Ending | 44:34.801 |
