On Today’s Show:
| Introduction | 0:00.000 |
| I Hate President’s Day | 1:59.654 |
| The New Timian Calendar System | 4:23.865 |
| Black Speaker Wants To Get Rid Of White Babies | 9:40.906 |
| The Gentlemen (And Lady) Callers Into The Spank Bank Voicemail System | 12:50.432 |
| Galileo Is Mad At Japan / Wants To Corrupt AI | 18:57.023 |
| Vomitting On Shrooms | 23:11.614 |
| Suport Quality Distortion: Sign Up For The Sideshow | 25:23.832 |
| Killing Your Bestie For Money And a Man | 26:46.905 |
| Pulling Out Your Gun Over a Fast Food Cookie | 31:41.905 |
| Take A Dip In My Pistol Pool | 35:54.186 |
| Voicemails: 206-666-4463 / Ending | 39:27.826 |
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