On Today’s Show:
On Today’s Show:
🧟♀️ Mama Boo Watch:
Tim’s meth-recovering, meat-craving mother is wreaking havoc at her new physical rehab facility. From yelling about wheelchair tetherball to accusing staff of terrorism and drug mishandling, it’s clear she’s not vibing with institutional care. Bonus: She might’ve been poisoned by improperly stored cancer meds. Lawyers, form a queue.
📼 Blast from the Hentai Past:
Tim unearthed a piece of anime porn history: Gonad the Barbarian (1986), one of the first hentai titles ever dubbed into English. Join Princess Lamy, Dr. Chirkoff from ASS, and the galactic sexbot army known as GAS as they explore dildonic weapons, anal invasions, and a dog named Scotty who licks way too enthusiastically.
🧨 4th of July Follies:
A rapper named 4Xtra decided to literally “blow up” on social media by holding lit fireworks and taunting viewers. The fireworks answered back by removing two of his fingers. A GoFundMe now aims to reassemble what remains of his podcasting hand. Tim suggests a new stage name: 2Fewer.
🎤 Elderly Karaoke Theater Presents:
Old people butchering Montell Jordan’s This Is How We Do It—because nothing screams “West Side party” like hospice hip-hop.
🌪️ Fake Flooding Conspiracies & Cloud Commanders:
Georgia congressional candidate Kandiss Taylor thinks Texas flash floods are fake. So does Marjorie Taylor Greene. Solution? Psychic weather warrior T. Chase, who tries to make clouds into squares by chanting at them on YouTube. Tim suggests appointing him head of NOAA.
🥊 White House Fight Night?!
Trump wants a UFC event held on the White House lawn for America’s 250th birthday in 2026. Conor McGregor’s down. Tim’s somewhere between horrified and ready to place bets on Kamala vs. Kid Rock.
📸 First Amendment Audit Gone Awry:
Redneck Yosemite Sam gets pepper-sprayed after accusing a YouTuber of “photocopying” him. He doesn’t want to be Xeroxed. Or spiral-bound. Or collated. Just another day in public space harassment content.
📞 Listener Voicemails:
- Sweet Rectum Ralph shares NE Ohio love for Mama Boo.
- Unicorn Hamster still confuses Tim’s audience.
- Goon Spader Jisberg suggests compiling a Mama Boo Special retrospective — Tim’s onboard!
- Tim contemplates what it would take to have sex with Mead. Spoiler: A lifetime Sideshow membership? Maybe. (And a big dick.)
💥 Exclusive Content Alert:
Sideshow freaks, rejoice!
- New bonus segment drops later today
- Tomorrow’s full-length episode is Sideshow-only
- Support the stupidity: Join the Sideshow
Contact:
📧 Email: show@distortedview.com
📱 Voicemail: 206-666-4463 (Oh God, Is It…)
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5-star ratings, Apple Podcasts thumbs-ups, and awkward over-the-phone voicemails from your mom are all welcome.Independence Day the Distorted View way: confused, cracked out, and covered in duck cum.
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