On Today’s Show:
- 💥 Slap Fight Carnage: One man’s face swells like a ketchup packet until it literally bursts—blood sprays everywhere and audience members are puking in the parking lot. Just another day in the UFC’s Power Slap League!
- 👻 A Ghost With a Fat, Hairy Agenda: Will Blunderfield is visited in a dream by a spectral advocate for bushy vaginas. She’s not resting in peace—she’s spreading pussy positivity from the great beyond.
- 🥇 Competitive Cum Swallowing: The stakes are high and the spunk is thicker than ever in this high-octane EFukt compilation.
- 🌈 Will Blunderfield Updates: The hummus cannon is primed, the dragon pearls are humming, and the gym bros are unknowingly feeding him their energy (and pre-cum).
- 🚌 Bus Driver Breakdown: An unpaid fare turns public transit into a public meltdown—complete with “suck my dick” chants and accusations of “white man payments.”
- 💣 Show-and-Tell Gets Explosive: A WWII grenade makes an unexpected appearance at an elementary school. Cue army bomb squad.
- 🐕 Kansas Man Bites Dog: Naked man, public bathroom, and dog-ear munching. You know, classic gas station hijinks.
- 🧠 Wart Porn is a Thing Now: Anal cauliflower, breeding diseased holes, and comments that make even you feel sick.
- 🎶 Linda Finkel Hall of Fame Nominee: A Bon Jovi cover so bad, it blue-balls you before the chorus even hits.
Voicemails from the Freaks:
- 🖤 Lifetime Sideshow members check in with love, support, and praise for Mama Henson.
- 🐹 Unicorn Hamster confesses to another secret gay affair—this one fueled by wine, dick, and bad life decisions.
💉 In the News:
Kansas man tasered after biting officers and his own dog. Arrested. Dog’s fine.
Colorado man claims 3,000 fentanyl pills are just for personal use (Judge: “lol no”).
Texas woman smuggles fentanyl in her vagina. It’s the new Flintstones Chewable.
WW2 grenade in a kid’s backpack = ultimate show-and-tell buzzkill.
00:00:00 Introduction 00:26:16 Proefessional Slap Fighting 07:33:07 The Tangy Taste Of Jizz Is Not For Everyone 10:04:14 Tasting Your Own Pre-Hummus Straight From The Cannon 12:31:11 Getting A Visit From A Fat Vagina-ed Ghost 15:24:23 Freakout On The Public Busline 19:24:18 Confronting Your Cheating Girlfriend Mid-Blowjob 21:41:18 A Linda Finkle Hall Of Fame Nominee 23:22:22 Sign Up For The Sideshow! 26:05:13 Vaginal Fentanyl Smuggling 30:17:22 An Explosive Show And Tell 33:11:11 Angry Naked Man Found With His Dog In A Public Restroom 39:02:18 Voicemails: 206-666-4463 / Ending
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