The Great AI Data Center Piss Drive of 2026 – NEW!

August 21, 20265 min read

Tim

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The Great AI Data Center Piss Drive of 2026 – NEW!

Episode Summary:

It’s the Friday show, freaks! Tim wraps up the week with a late-night prank-call experiment alongside Brad Carter, a woman accused of stabbing her boyfriend and cutting off his penis over a pregnancy that apparently didn’t exist, and perhaps the most environmentally responsible idea of 2026: sending your piss to AI data centers.

On Today’s Show

📞 Tim & Brad Carter Harass People at Midnight

Listener/sponsor Ralph wanted Tim and prank-call veteran Brad Carter to mess with his sister Bruna over her eyebrow-threading business. Unfortunately, Bruna immediately realizes something stupid is happening, leaving Tim and Brad scrambling through an increasingly convoluted story involving stolen Wi-Fi.

With that masterpiece dead on arrival, the guys move on to another unsuspecting victim — calling a woman around midnight to inform her that they’ve been metal detecting in her backyard and discovered something suspicious underground.

Naturally, they’d like to return with ground-penetrating radar.

Naturally, she would prefer they stay the hell out of her yard.

Tim also talks with Brad about how difficult prank calling has become in the age of cellphones, call screening and AI answering services — and plays part of one of Brad’s much more successful calls involving a UPS driver who claims he’s been sitting on a customer’s package all day.

🍆 Woman Allegedly Cut Off Boyfriend’s Penis Over a Baby That Didn’t Exist

A bizarre Colorado murder case gets even stranger.

Shenting Gao, accused of stabbing her boyfriend Dustin Nalls and cutting off his penis during a 2024 argument involving infidelity and whether Nalls fathered a child Gao believed she was carrying, has pleaded not guilty by reason of insanity.

But there’s one rather significant problem with the alleged argument: Gao apparently wasn’t pregnant.

Tim examines the gruesome allegations, including Gao allegedly leaving the injured Nalls to buy rubbing alcohol, antibiotics and beer before returning and giving him ibuprofen, water and greens.

Plus: Was Maury secretly preventing penis-related violence by giving America an orderly system for resolving paternity disputes?

💦 Liquid Death & Garage Beer Want Your Pee

Forget nuclear power. Forget solar. Forget complicated closed-loop cooling systems.

The future of artificial intelligence runs on piss.

Liquid Death and Garage Beer have teamed up for a satirical campaign asking Americans to donate their urine to help cool thirsty AI data centers.

Former NFL star Jason Kelce appears in the campaign’s musical ad, while the companies are selling an $18 “Data Center Coolant Collector” — essentially a fancy branded pee jar.

The companies repeatedly warn customers not to actually mail their urine to data centers, despite spending the rest of the campaign encouraging precisely that.

Even better for Tim: the “urine drive” is headed to Cincinnati Oktoberfest in September.

Also on the Show

Tim checks the Harry Cunt text line for freak feedback about Cherry 7-Up, cranberry ginger ale, 7-Up changing its formula, Mead’s apparently still extremely limited employment ambitions, and the continuing mystery surrounding Monday’s episode disappearing/reappearing in Apple Podcasts.

Then it’s voicemail time, including celebrity desert-island fantasies, the ancient female ritual of examining one’s vagina with a mirror, and the important question:

Would Tim rather have sex with a little person or an AI robot?

The answer leads to an unexpected discussion of extremely muscular little people, lumberjacks and Tim’s increasingly confusing sexual interests.